Let’s face it, even if I wish it wasn’t true, we all have to deal with nasty people at some point in our lives. If it is a short moment you have to speak with them, you will probably forget that easily as it is just a bad moment in your day. But what if you have to study or work around such a person regularly?
Having somebody always grumpy, openly judgemental and extremely rude around you is not something that can continue for ages without affecting you. At some point, it becomes a problem. I mean, while you want to feel good among your colleagues in school, university or work, and think about positive stuff or work towards your goals during the day, somebody keeps showing up to criticize literally everybody, spread negativity, and start conflicts. It just doesn’t sound fair. So, how should we deal with such people?
First of all, deal with the fact that such people are unavoidable. I mean, if you haven’t met them at school, you’ll definitely meet them later in college, university or work. If you’re like I used to be and believe in people being good by nature, I suggest you watch the news every night for a week. Nasty people I am speaking about are not necessarily those the news is about, but what I mean to say is that they do exist around us. And even if it seems hard to understand their mind, you should just accept that some people think pretty differently about life. Finally, if you think that you are a nasty person in that you kinda sorta intentionally make other people’s lives miserable, I suggest you start paying people for being your friends because that is not going to last forever and then you’ll become even worse than you are now. Except that the only person whose life you’ll be making miserable will be you.
Ignore or Confront them?
It’s often a good choice to ignore them but ONLY as long as it doesn’t make you feel angry regularly. I know we all want to be peacemakers, and that a lot of movies show us that good triumphs over evil, but this is exactly why those stories are called fiction. Sometimes it works, and sometimes it doesn’t. Let’s say you decided to be silent around that person and ignore their direct remarks or rude behaviour because you want to stay “good” instead of becoming “just like them.” But now your emotions are boiling over inside you every time you have to deal with them because that’s how angry you are and feel this is so unfair. Do you think these feelings are any better then what you had felt before? I say, if you can ignore the person because it helps you feel better, do it. But if it’s not how that works for you, find some courage, calm down, and confront that person. While I’m not suggesting you should start a fight, sometimes it’s a good idea to stop being so nice for a moment, which may help clearing things up and showing your own worth.
Try to Understand them
Now to make sure you don’t think I suggest fighting hate by hating back, or just simply starting a fight, my last tip would be that you should try to understand that person for a moment. Usually, even if it seems he or she is just a crazy and pathetic human being, try to think that they are probably just very unhappy. They have their own sad reasons to act like that, probably, and that is why I would rather feel sorry for them than hate them. The thing is, somebody as difficult as that is most probably just very insecure about much more in their life than you are. And, unfortunately, this is their way to deal with those insecurities. Rude and disrespectful people are so often just being insecure and defensive, even though it might seem it’s all about you. If you stop and look at them carefully, chances are, you’ll see someone frightened, unhappy and full of anger or hate, often self-hate, by the way.
Finally, try to avoid having such people around you if you can, and if you can’t, keep in mind that “rudeness is the weak man’s imitation of strength” which means that you’re already stronger than that nasty classmate or a colleague at work.
Don’t let them ruin your day!